tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3405558996113640045.post2007802140026169330..comments2023-04-22T15:31:36.047-04:00Comments on Hope Floats Among the Cherry Blossoms: A Yellow JacketJamiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06275071143469111072noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3405558996113640045.post-81429912095352887452013-07-07T20:49:22.371-04:002013-07-07T20:49:22.371-04:00Thank you for sharing that moment of your life wit...Thank you for sharing that moment of your life with me. I am sorry that you had to feel that hurt more than once, especially while you are in the process of finding acceptance and/or resolve with your loss. When the biological child possibility is taken off the table, it is a deep pain. When I had been married, he had MF IF and we would not have been able to have children. Now that the relationship is (sadly) over, children are *kind of* back on the table for me. But, that involves finding a partner and all of the other steps along the way before children could really be considered. In some ways I can relate to your pain, but in others I cannot. But that is how it goes, we each have our own story, our own journey. Thank you for your words of support.Jamiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06275071143469111072noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3405558996113640045.post-61633360758663994822013-07-07T20:37:09.911-04:002013-07-07T20:37:09.911-04:00I know this is a late reply, but I just wanted to ...I know this is a late reply, but I just wanted to say thank you so much for you thoughtful and heartfelt response. Thank you for getting it and pointing out that the yellow coat could always return, which crossed my mind. But, I know I can't hold onto everything and cannot expect my mom to do the same. I like the idea of holding onto those things that seem truly important. I guess part of me did not want to pass on an opportunity to give the pearls to someone who I know would appreciate them, but there will be other little girls down the road who may also like them just as much. Part of me would feel sad if something like the pearls never found a home, too, if that makes sense. The question is sometimes how long? But, I appreciate your thoughts that there is no rush, there is still time...in many ways. Thank you!<br />Jamiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06275071143469111072noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3405558996113640045.post-73908230500002024882013-06-01T21:43:11.962-04:002013-06-01T21:43:11.962-04:00In a small drawer, in my mother's house, there...In a small drawer, in my mother's house, there are three little dresses that I wore as a child. I have a niece, who I adore, and if one day she has a little girl, they will go to her. I know just how you feel. We have MF IF, but I am now 44. Recently, we have a little cousin who has come to the U.S. from Spain, and we are all in love with him. He is 3. When I told my sister in law that my niece and I "plotted" to steal him away, she once responded, better to leave it to my niece. My niece is now 20. It was a passing remark, to indicate that she my niece would have more energy... but it was also a remark to let me know that the ship of having a child has passed for me. It hurt me immensely. The assumption by others, which I have heard more than once, that this is no longer possible for me hurts terribly, even if I am half way towards accepting my life without biological children of my own. IrisDhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14120842144868527846noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3405558996113640045.post-21031091873682245002013-05-10T20:27:55.494-04:002013-05-10T20:27:55.494-04:00I completely went through this with several items ...I completely went through this with several items that I had "saved" for my future child. For years they sat in a closet, away from my view, so they didn't hurt my feelings. I couldn't stand looking at them, and when my sister in-law had her daughter, I took one of the items out and gave it to her (because it was girly). As much as it broke my heart, I did it. It was almost like admitting defeat. It felt like I was finally saying, "Ok. Children aren't in my playbook so I need to get rid of these reminders." Three days later, we found out about our son. Keep the things that are truly important to you (like the pearls). Even if you never have a daughter, you may have a niece or a granddaughter (God willing) some day who would love to have them! Think of the yellow jacket as a loaner. If it was in such great shape after all of these years, it will still be in great shape if you are blessed with a daughter. You will get it back, believe me! You will be inundated with all of the clothing you'll ever need and you will enjoy seeing your own daughter wearing it. <br /><br />I know you hurt and this is a horrible time of year and an extremely painful holiday. I won't tell you to focus on your OWN mom, because people told me that and it didn't help. I still wallowed in my own pain every year and distanced myself from those that didn't understand, which was just about everyone. If you are fortunate enough to have some good childless friends down there, go out to eat and spend time with them. Do something FUN, even though you don't feel like it. Remember that I'm thinking of you and certainly praying that this is the last of your painful Mother's Days. :)Dianehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05026087145684383010noreply@blogger.com