So, much has been settled from my divorce. The only legal thing that has tied us together has been my car. Even though we agreed the car would be mine, it still had to remain in both of our names because there were still payments left on it. Talk about a pain in the butt when I moved to Florida and had to get a new title and registration. However, once the car was paid off, it would be transferred to solely me.
Car was paid off in May. I started looking into the details of the new title ahead of time so I would be prepared. I waited for the pay off letter to email my prior spouse so there was proof no money was owed on it. The process should have been very simple because it was an electronic title. But, no. He had to go and complicate things and lie about it!
I made two trips to the DMV. And there were additional costs because he had the title printed and mailed to him. He was caught in his lie of saying he was looking into it when the DMV shared with me the date he requested the paper title to be printed. Fortunately, I had options. Since I had legal documentation that the car was mine and a power of attorney document for the car from my prior out of state registering process, they could wait 30 days and consider that the paper title was "lost." Then, I could request a new one to be printed and get it all switched over to me. Or he could sign and appropriately mark the box on the paper title and send it to me. He lied again about putting it in the mail, which I called him out on it. But, either way I was returning to the DMV and going to get my car. Fortunately, it came in the mail the day before I went to the DMV. So, while the electronic title would have been the cheapest and fastest route, it would have been most expensive to go the title "lost" route.
Why?! Why complicate things when you were the one to so quickly want me out of your life? I was proud of myself for keeping the email communications brief and to the point. I initially believed him when he said he was still looking into the details. My blood wanted to boil when the lady at the DMV told me he had already requested a paper title and that it had been mailed to him about three weeks ago. Really?! You are "looking into things?" I was seriously concerned he was going to try to take my car.
Then once it was all signed and done, I felt a little sad and almost teared up. I took a deep breath and put it behind me at the DMV. The sadness surprised me. I figured that would come with the annulment, not a car. But maybe it was because he hasn't participated in the annulment process and has just ignored it (making it even longer), and that the car was the last thing we had reason to communicate. I thought I would have felt relief.
But I didn't, just sad. Not a sad that I miss him. Not a sad that this would be the last time to "speak" to each other (if you count email). Not a sad that I wanted him back.
Maybe a sad for that distant loss. Maybe sad for a good-bye that was never said. Maybe a sad to honor what had once been cherished, loved and important.