I confess, I am a junky when it comes to taking the personality quizzes you find on facebook. I rarely post my results, but I love taking them! Yes, I want to know what kind of house I should live in or which Disney princess I would be or which two words describe me. And just when I think, I am done with this silly, mindless time suck, there appears the next quiz to fill the hole of gaining more personal insights. Haha! I am such a sucker. :)
But, there was a quiz that gave me pause. At first, I was just going to pass on it. But, then I saw a guy friend post his results and thought what the heck? The quiz was called, "How Many Kids Are You Going to Have?"
I wasn't sure if I wanted to know the answer because I was a little afraid it would say "zero." Then, I went back to my friend's results and his comment. He is single and got "one" and made a hopeful remark that sounds about right and that he hopes to meet a good woman someday. It struck me as simple, honest and sweet. So, I took the quiz.
My result was "twins." The blurb said something about two for the price of one--in maybe wanting one pregnancy, but being blessed with two. It made me smile.
As I am getting older, I find that I am changing my thoughts on family building. When I was younger and in my twenties, I daydreamed of having four to six kids. Over time, that number is decreasing. It is in part because of practical reasons, time and managing expectations. But, it is also in part with wanting less, to simplify things in life--like having a smaller home, less things. My mind has been shifting towards thinking that maybe one child is all that I would want--to be able to devote more attention, time and resources towards them. But, getting the result of twins makes me happy because maybe deep down I still do want more than one child. There is also something very special about twins. It speaks to me somehow.
The quiz gives me hope. It is not too late. It is validating in that it is okay to still playfully dream of a child. That I am still deserving to be a mother, maybe someday.